May 23, 2023

Been doing a lot of thinking, and brushing it off lately… For the most part the brushing off has been about my foot. Walking around with a fracture now since before May 13 I know for sure, cause Cook got me on video! I was limping my way to the stage to receive my Kenti sash in the Black graduation! So, it’s been at least May 10 since my foot started bothering me. Another revelation is that my kids are ready for me to fly away ole bird! I’m learning a lot by listening and thinking about my expectations and the expectations of others. I said that I would be moving out in May, and now that it is May I have a fracture in my right foot! I’m hoping to get that resolved soon! It’s looking like it might be tough to work summer school but I must earn some money if I am to get out of this house.

The revelation is that I have no where to go. My momma house is run down and owned by the bank. My brother lives with his girlfriend and her daughter and grandkids who I would rather not deal with because they are not nice people. These people live so far above their means that they expect someone else to cover their financial shortcomings. My best friend who lives in Oklahoma with her husband has agreed to help me with shelter. How will I get there? How will I get my car there? How will I get to work without a car? I don’t have any money. I have not worked consistently since December. I have been providing full time daycare for room and board. I don’t know what to do. I lost my house. I lost my mom and now I can’t ever go home again. 

I don’t want to be in California anymore. There’s nothing here that reminds me of good memories. I need a new start before my chance is gone. Hopefully I can get into nursing and earn a masters. Come through HBCU! Gimme some housing too please 🙏🤷🏽‍♀️ I promise to work hard for it!