This 3am thing is getting worse! What am I supposed to do? I don’t want to spend the rest of my life missing the hints so I’m back at it with you. We did some good work before and I was hoping you could help me out again.

How do I deal with this pain and regret that I feel every day? I cannot go back in time and undo the mistakes so now what? I’m not even sure how we were able to make such progress before you know? Did the realizations just drop into my spirit? Was it something that I read, or heard from someone else? I’ve got to get back there. To a place where my mind is at peace and I am grateful for my life. 

I’m grateful for my life as I know that it could be so much worse. I could still be stuck in a loveless marriage fighting to be heard. Wishing to be understood. 

I was having a conversation with my kids about religion and spirituality. We determined that spirituality is a good thing and religion is a plague that has taken so many lives and is doing so at this very moment! I wonder how and why it is still so prominent? The way religion breeds division and opposition is crazy! 

What is the point? 

Life is such a painful journey for some. If you’re lucky you learn to embrace the positive things. You look on the bright side. You choose wisely…For those of us who are not so lucky that wisdom is hard earned and at 50 years old we are counting on the one hand the positives that remain. 

Religion offers what humanity cannot. That being that a God that doesn’t leave you in the dark. He is always available. He is all knowing. He loves you even though you’re not always so loveable.

Religion offers hope.

Hope is the one thing that makes life bearable. Today was rough. I wrestled with the guilt of my mistakes. I hope to make amends tomorrow. I hope you forgive me. I hope you are enjoying life. I hope you have all the good stuff that life has to offer. I hope…