Today’s lesson in being kind and “just listen” started at 3 am. I woke up this morning like I do everyday (between the hours of 2-6 am. Worrying about momma). I know that the diaper she is wearing should be soaked and diaper rash is not a welcome condition, so I am trying to prevent it. I check on her and she’s sleeping peacefully. I’m going back and forth in my mind trying to decide if I should wake her because she has a tough time sleeping because of the pain of the rotten diabetic ulcerative sores on her feet.
So, there I am at 3 am pacing the hallway hashing out the consequences of leaving her in the wet diaper ensuring diaper rash or waking her up to change her. If she wakes and that pain in her feet starts she won’t be able to go back to sleep.
It’s not long before she wakes up and calls out to me. I go in to answer her and before entering the room I I speak the words “Be kind and just listen “. Some of you may read that and say “Duh!” You don’t understand why, but it’s a sad predicament that I find myself in because I been hard of hearing to her voice for most of my life! I’m learning now (at 50 years old) that I need to listen and not just to hear her. but everything that is said to me.
This pain in my head that I have been suffering with is affecting my hearing and yesterday I contemplated the idea of complete hearing loss. What will I do if this trend in my head continues? I don’t want to think about it but I’m being forced to do so. Well I’m hoping that I can keep my hearing, but should it leave me in silence I will have this lesson down because my momma is teaching me to listen now.