January 2, 2021 4:23 am 

I been up for almost 2 hours and I can’t sleep. I’m worried about momma. She’s in a nursing home and with Covid-19 restrictions I can’t see her. Everyday she’s calling me telling me all her troubles. Sick old people troubles nothing extraordinary, except that COVID restrictions keep everyone who might visit out, therefore leaving room for neglect by the employees who do not have a heart for the patients. Nurses who care for cute and sickly babies are more likely not be neglectful, but those who are in geriatrics are not the same. I get it that geriatric patients are not so cute and cuddly. Some have dementia and can be cantankerous and combative. While others are not so bad they stink and have opinions about their care. I can see how it could be a hard job to perform. 

I don’t want momma to feel neglected. Due to her incontinence, I won’t sleep with her in my care. Due to my heart for her, I cannot sleep with her in that place. I’m so torn about the decision to take her home because I know that I am not capable of doing it alone, but this facility has tons of people and they don’t seem to be able either. At least if and when I fail her she will know I love her and I am trying. Those people don’t care about her. It’s a job to them. She’s my momma. I hope that I can take her home and be successful in caring for her…God if you’re real, I could use some help now🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽