I gotta shrink myself!! A weekly series (session 6)

It’s been two weeks since Salt’s last session. The doctor doesn’t know what happened or why she hasn’t been in to see him. Let’s listen in and find out!

DrFeelGood : Good afternoon Salt. We’ve missed you the last two weeks. How are you?

Salt: I’m good doc. A friend and I went on a trip together.

DrFeelGood : Really? How was the trip? Where did you go?

Salt: The trip was good. We took a relaxing cruise to Mexico.

DrFeelGood : Oh? I assume you got some rest?

Salt: Yes doc I got more rest than I wanted!

DrFeelGood : How is that?

Salt: My friend turned out to be a bust.

DrFeelGood : I am confused. What do you mean?

Salt: You see my friend is this guy that I have known for 20 years since high school. We didn’t date in high school or anything but he said that he had a crush on me.

DrFeelGood : Oh well. How did this trip come about?

Salt: We’d been cyber dating for a few months now. He’d been flirting with the idea of spending some time with me offline.

DrFeelGood : Tell me about your friend.

Salt: His name is Will. He’s a 50 year old bachelor and he works 6 days a week. He leases a one bedroom apartment in South Gate. Wow!

DrFeelGood : What is it Salt?

Salt: I mean just saying that out loud is really…

DrFeelGood : Really what Salt?

Salt: What’s the word for when you realize something important that you hadn’t thought about?

DrFeelGood : You recognize something?

Salt: Yeah that’s it! I kept reminding myself about how sweet this man is during the whole trip. I’m beginning to understand why now.

DrFeelGood: Why did you feel the need to remind yourself of his temperament? What happened?

Salt: I was doing that thing again that I do with the guys that I date.

DrFeelGood : I’m sorry what “thing”?

Salt: I have this dating ritual I guess you could call it. I meet a man (usually online) and initially I am open to the possibilities. We go through the ‘what are your likes and dislikes ‘ and converse about life and everything else.

DrFeelGood : That sounds good so far. I don’t understand what is this ‘thing’?

Salt: We will be talking and getting to know each other and I will begin to notice things.

DrFeelGood : What do you mean “notice things”?

Salt: Let’s take Will for example. During one of our first conversations he tells me about an incident that occurred with his ex girlfriend. It’s not a big deal that you bring up your ex. I am not insecure or the jealous type.

DrFeelGood : What was the problem then?

Salt: Will kept talking about how she was selfish and he gave everything of himself and she just took, instead of reciprocating.

DrFeelGood : What is wrong with that?

Salt: I guess nothing if you wanna believe that he is being 100 percent honest.

DrFeelGood : Why don’t you think he’s being honest?

Salt: Because nobody is 100% on everything! The statement he made about the relationship essentially being her victim set my dating ritual off!

DrFeelGood : The dating ritual is?

Salt: They make one false move and I pick them apart!

DrFeelGood : How’s that Salt?

Salt: Take Will, the victim, he’s sweet to take me on a trip, but is he really? We stayed in the same room so that is making it easier to get some booty! Is he being sweet or horny?

DrFeelGood : Lol! Surely you can understand how a man may want to increase the booty odds!

Salt: Yeah doc I can appreciate that but I cannot ignore the things that I see that bother me.

DrFeelGood : Give me an example.

Salt: Like if you want booty why wouldn’t you brush your teeth?! I mean seriously the man has a bridge of tartar so heavy on his lower teeth that you cannot see where one tooth begins and the next one ends!

DrFeelGood : (Shaking his head and laughing to himself the dr asks) So, is tartar a deal breaker?

Salt: Yes doc. I think it might be.

DrFeelGood : I don’t understand Salt why?

Salt: Doc! Do you know how much bacteria live in tartar? You wanna kiss me with a whole civilization of bugs in your mouth? How bad is your breath?

DrFeelGood : I don’t know what to think about this.

Salt: Maybe it isn’t a deal breaker for some, but please advise me how to bring up the subject without offending him? Like do I buy him a toothbrush and floss and say it’s a gift ‘just because’?

DrFeelGood : I don’t know how to delicately tell a 50 year old man that wants to date you to brush his teeth! I must be honest with you Salt. I think this is what is called ‘Avoidance behavior’. We will revisit this and delve a bit deeper next time. Have a great week Salt.


  1. Wow,
    You write really well. I seriously am enjoying this story. I can kind of relate to Salt. Well written

    Liked by 1 person

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