It’s Sunday morning and I’m thinking of D. We said our goodbyes yesterday and I cried. I knew that it was coming. I noticed the paradigm shift in his withdrawal from me. It was subtle and quiet but I recognized it. Yesterday was December 22. It was September 22 that D contacted me for the first time. In exactly 3 months or 90 days he made a lasting impact on my life. I’m missing him already but I know that all good things must come to an end. D was and will continue to be a good thing for me. He taught me how to love myself again. I don’t know if that’s what he was trying to do. It seemed like he was trying more to convince me that a relationship between us was possible. Me a 48 year old divorced woman and he a 23 year old man who has spent the last near decade in the prison system, and although I entertained his attention I never bought the dream. I have been told before this is real, and I only want you and it didn’t last. For one reason or another the time came around and they had to make their exit. I’ve learned to live in the moment enjoy the ride and prepare for the departure. This time is no different.
D is different though. A remarkable young man.
I believe he’s bubbling over with potential. Very smart and wise beyond his few years.
I hope to witness the mark that he makes on the world. I hope the world benefits from him like I did. If it gets a mere fraction of the inspiration that I enjoyed it will affect the masses. I am being a champion for him and releasing him as I believe he would want me to. Dear D,
I use this platform to say what I couldn’t say the day that you said goodbye. It’s been 2 days now and I’m having my first cry since I promised you that I wouldn’t. I want you to know that I love you and I wouldn’t change my experience with you one bit. You gave me a lifetimes worth of inspiration and hope for a love of my own. You gave me a zest for life unlike what I had before and I’m looking forward to the possibilities ahead for me in love and life. I thank heaven above for you! I hope and pray for you all that your beautiful heart desires! You said that you would have never approached me if you knew that you would end up hurting me. I’m glad that you cannot know the future because the pain of letting you go is minor in comparison to the good times you shared with me. I love you and be blessed indeed my beautiful beautiful friend. Love always Vee